Unsettled

A feeling of anxiety washes over me. There are butterflies in my stomach and I feel fuzzy around the edges. Focus is scattered when it is most critical that I focus on the tasks at hand. The uncertainty of the future seems formidable and it feels as though the path I must walk is only mine. No one can accompany me; I will be alone to face whatever life will throw as obstacles in my direction. The decision to be made scares me. It makes me rely on the unknown and my abilities (unknown to me). I’m like a blind person groping in the darkness and trying to sense whether it is safe to proceed in ‘this’ direction. At times like these, there is only ‘intuition’ I suppose…there is no safety blanket, no insurance policy if things go wrong, there is only self and the will. I hope I will find the courage to see clearly and most of all to believe.